Tuesday, March 12, 2024

Theatrical Review: Kung Fu Panda 4


Date- Saturday March 9 2024
Location- stroud mall cinemark
Party- 3 (my mom, sister and I)
Time- 11:25am (actual movie started around 11:45)



Review

I’d seen all of the Kung Fu Panda movies at least once. The first at least twice and that was the only one I didn’t see in a theater.
So I can’t approach this movie from the typical approach- comparing it to the previous installments. But as a Dreamworks animated movie, it was another solid effort.

This is the first time DreamWorks had a proper intro. It usually just shows the logo. They’ve since done a complete overhaul where they show the notable characters from their other movies (Shrek and Fiona, and toothless the dragon are the only ones I remember at the moment) interacting with the boy from the logo before he goes to his home in the crescent moon. Loved it.

This was a movie my sister had wanted to see and we both thoroughly enjoyed it.
There’d been some dark stuff in some of the earlier movies, particularly Po’s backstory and villains figuring into them. This one was devoid of that. There’s still some dramatic moments but it’s probably the most light hearted of the movies since the first one.
But again, my memory of the previous films isn’t great. I know the second one was kinda dark because of its villain’s connection to Po.

With the exception of the scene during the credits (we left after this sequence and the song ended so I don’t know if there’s also a post credits scene), this is the first time the furious five aren’t featured in the movie.
That being said, Po’s new associate has more than enough personality to go around- thanks to 
Awkwafina giving another killer voice over performance.

Just to give a basic layout of the plot:
Shifu has decided that it’s time for Po to find a successor to the title of Dragon Warrior, so he may assume his new role as spiritual leader. Which Shifu’s teacher had before him.
Po, of course, is hesitant to relinquish the role that gave him a sense of purpose. He also proves on multiple occasions why his new title might not suit him as well. There’s a running joke through the whole movie about how bad he is about creating thoughtful proverbs. And when he is borderline successful, his words are twisted around to mean something hilariously wrong.
Then we have our bad guy- The Chameleon- played by viola davis. (I had no idea it was her until the credits. Another bad ass performance). Her goal is world domination, extending her reach beyond Juniper City where most of the movie takes place. She strikes fear into her enemies by changing her appearance into more intimidating foes. But she also has a major axe to grind. She wanted to learn Kung fu but all of the masters she sought training from turned her down. Discriminated against her because of her size. So her goal is to steal Kung fu powers from the spirit world in order to rule.
… in not as many words, it’s essentially the same plot as Space Jam, except she’s the one in charge. Whereas the aliens, who are challenged to a basketball game by the looney tunes and stole talent from active NBA players, they are underlinings.

Po is alerted to this villainous plot by Zhen, a silver fox he catches trying to pilfer artifacts from the temple. Then when a group of rams (seen in the first moments of the movie being attacked, seemingly, by Tai Lung, the first movie's villain) beseeches him for help.
So of course he turns to Zhen for help, offering to reduce her prison sentence in exchange.

There’s also the comic relief element that’s provided by Po’s adoptive dad Mr. Ping and his actual dad, Li, as both follow Po a few days behind to offer help if it’s needed.
And to their credit, they actually do help out when it matters. Meanwhile there’s some pretty funny shenanigans that happen on their journey.
Notably, they come to a restaurant where Po and Zhen recently trashed the place and make things worse. Seriously, whose idea was it to build this building precariously on that seaside cliff? Only asking for trouble, haha

I had my suspicions early and while Zhen’s story arc was a little predictable, she’s a very lovable character. In part because I love foxes but it was definitely the type of role tailor made for 
Awkwafina. Her comedic timing and quirks really shine here.
We had a relatively small group in the theater with us, but I’ll always remember one dude gasping when there’s a big reveal about her later in the movie. Things like that are why going to the movies is such an enjoyable group experience.

Another somewhat predictable thing- Po spends the whole movie carrying around this staff as part of his new role. That thing was just begging to be lost or stolen.

These movies are known for their humor and it’s kinda funny when even the villain gets a sarcastic comment.
She plans to use the blood moon to open the spirit world to steal the Kung fu powers. She’s waiting for it to rise and later bemoans “is it always this slow?” and chooses not to wait for it.
Having experienced blood moons in The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild series (as a player as well as a spectator), the doomsday vibe brought on by its appearance wasn’t lost on me.

During the final battle sequence where Po fights The Chameleon and her stolen Kung Fu, we have various cameos from the series. Only Tai Lung gets any notable dialogue and it’s in the school of belittling the protagonist and other unhelpful snark. It is a pretty cool sequence, though.
The only thing I was kinda missing was an otherwise common occasion where powers or talent are typically stolen. Or something Ash once said about Pikachu in a battle- “they can copy Pikachu but there’s nothing like the real thing.” And it’s going to bug me that I completely forgot how that quote came about. I used to know that series so well, especially when the original cast was still part of it.
My point is that The Chameleon was able to use these powers as soon as she got them. And I really thought that was going to be her ultimate undoing. Instead it was the typical “biting off more than you can chew” and “pride cometh before the fall”.
And maybe I am over thinking a movie geared toward a younger audience but there are some good lessons. Particularly about how change is hard but it is necessary. There’s also one or two references that adults bringing their kids to this would appreciate. The cute fluffy bunnies that live in the thieves den with all of Zhen’s “family”— the action they get on the battle field takes a page from Monty python. They’re not as deadly as the killer rabbit but nonetheless not to be taken lightly.

I alluded to it earlier but definitely stick around for the credits. It has a training montage with the furious five that’s set to “hit me baby one more time”- performed by Jack Black and his band, Tenacious D.
As someone who grew up with Britney Spears in her prime, that was a REALLY good cover of that song. Odd combination but it worked really well.

Grade- A

Trailers:

Garfield
  • hopefully this is better than the bill murray movies were
  • As much as Garfield’s humor would fit in today’s world, putting him today’s world is still a bit concerning. And that doesn’t even include the whole spy novel angle they’re going in. This looks cute but I also can’t help ask WHY…
  • Chris Pratt and Awkwafina seem to be really in demand for their voice over work. How long before they do a movie together cuz I’d love to see it
Imaginary Friends
  • John Krasinski is going from “a quiet place” to this? That dude’s got range
  • It’s an interesting idea- imaginary friends needing to be adopted by new kids after their kid grows up. Add in Ryan Reynolds, it’s probably a halfway decent movie. Just not one I’d see

Inside out 2
  • this is something of a teaser trailer because only one of Riley’s new emotions makes an appearance. Gotta say- the fact anxiety came with tons of emotional baggage, I loved how they gave her tons of suitcases to demonstrate this
  • I know there’s a fair bit of anticipation leading up to this movie. I just hope it doesn’t twist me in knots the way the first movie did. I hadn’t sobbed that much during a movie since “my sister’s keeper” (and to those who complained the movie was a letdown after the book- I didn’t read the book. So it was an incredibly sad movie start to finish just at face value).


    Epic tails
  • I think it’s about a cat and mouse being friends, Poseidon threatens a town until it makes a statue of him and some sort of adventure is had so the two friends can reunite.
  • The movie was 3 days ago. I had no memory of this at all


    Despicable 4
  • honestly I thought this movie was already out… but if it was, we would’ve gone to see it already. And seeing as we’d seen every other movie in this franchise (except minions 2… not sure how we missed that one- we still say “peanut!” the same way as in the trailer, lol)


    The wild robot
  • Whoever did this trailer knew what they were doing. It said a lot with virtually no dialogue until the final seconds
  • It looks kinda like Wall-E except humanity never came back to earth and nature flourished without their interference
  • Do I smell Oscar buzz?

Brainstorming for a future RDJ biopic

Note: This is all hypothetical and strictly my imagination running wild. But hopefully someday this is done and done well.

I’m writing this (began drafting it last Friday) with the presumption he’s going to win an Oscar this weekend… but I won’t publish it until it happens. Wouldn’t want to jinx myself.
——




This has been said about Robert Downey Jr. a number of times in the past decade or two. His redemption arc is the classic Hollywood story. Him winning an Oscar after all he’d gone through, if I should be so bold to say so, all but guarantees that a movie will be made about his life and this Oscar win will be the grand finale.
Mind you, I’m not making all of this up just to fangirl about my favorite actor and fangasm (a word I got from him, by the way) about the possibilities this presents. It’s just, in true Hollywood fashion, it only makes sense. Everyone loves an underdog overcoming adversity and making the most epic comeback possible.
It’d also be cool if he took a page from Andrew McCarthy’s book and penned an autobiography of his own after finally getting this win. I’d be first in line to buy it.

Potential issues, complications and drawbacks
aka- the Devil's Advocate section


The big downside is that this movie would come with a few complications. Not simply limited to licensing issues, which are sure to happen depending on how many footage is taken from the Marvel movies.

First off, this will undoubtedly focus HEAVILY on his addictions and criminal history. All of the things I don’t want to focus on when I talk about him. He’d slayed all those demons nearly two decades ago so, as far as I’m concerned, there’s no point on focusing on it anymore.
Unfortunately that is a huge chunk of his life so of course it needs to be part of his story. His first joint (courtesy of Downey Sr.) when he was 8-9, the “method acting” while preparing to shoot Less than Zero, up through the 90s where he was in and out of rehab at least 2-3 times. The most significant part of this arc being the court tv moment where the judge sends him to Corcoran for jail time, reasoning “this just might save your life.” I don’t know for sure if that was also the same day Robert compared his addiction to black tar heroin as “it’s like having a gun in my mouth and I like the taste of gun metal.”
One final rehab stint happened during his time on Ally McBeal. His soon-to-be wife Susan had also said in one article she had faced with that darkness in him once (I forget the metaphor she used, probably Darth Vader) and she gave him an ultimatum. After which he threw his drugs in the ocean and he’d been clean ever since.
I am paraphrasing a bit here. I do have the article saved somewhere.

A movie needs conflict, obviously, but how much of it will exclusively be about this one thing… I don’t know. There should be more than that but this also needs to be authentic as possible. It can’t be like that Chaplin biopic he did where it jumped from one wife to the next with a little of J Edgar Hoover’s witch hunt against him sprinkled in.
At least there’s only a few notable relationships in Robert’s life. Sarah Jessica Parker before his first wife, Deborah falconer. Calista Flockhart for a short time while he was doing the show and separated from his wife. Then his current marriage, going strong since 2005.

Another potential issue- some of the people that influenced Robert and his career path have since been implicated by the MeToo movement or had otherwise been cancelled for one reason or another.
James Toback who worked with him in “the pickup artist” and wrote “two girls and a guy” specifically for him to have work fresh out of rehab in the 90s- he’d had dozens of accusers come forward about him like what happened with Harvey Weinstein. I still feel like he contributed to Robert’s breadth of work and really helped him and it’d be a shame to leave all that out because his inclusion would bother people.
Charlie Rose, in 2003, conducted maybe my favorite interview Robert ever did. I’d love footage of that to be included, but like Matt Lauer, stuff came out about him and women so that would rub people the wrong way. Unless they just had a clip of Robert saying at their roundtable- “it serves a small part of your soul to blow it up cuz if you survive it, you’ll realize there are forces you may never understand that have your back and they’re fairly forgiving”.

Then of course there’s Mel Gibson… I’m not condoning or forgiving any of his transgressions. But the fact remains that he gave Robert a big job after his final stint of rehab. He cast him in a movie adaptation of the British series “the singing detective” and paid the insurance so he could work. That was the start of the path leading him to where he is now.

And no, it’s not as easy as “we’ll just rewrite history and make a different person the one who helped him in these instances.” It doesn’t work like that.
Aside from Susan, the only other advocate in his life I can think of who hasn’t been implicated in some career ending controversy is Jodie foster. There’s one story while working “home for the holidays” where she stops by his trailer. Apparently he was strung out and had lots of “projects” around the room. Like a model of the space shuttle. And she says something like “I think you know I’m aware of what’s going on here. It’s ok on this film because it’s a safe role but don’t think you can get away with getting caught doing this again.”
And you can’t do what they did on Harry Potter, giving all of Dobby’s contributions to Neville. I don’t know beyond this moment how else Jodie foster helped Robert but not enough where you can substitute her in place of Mel Gibson.
Sean Penn might have been an advocate as well but I can’t say for sure. And I’m not sure whether he’s free of controversy. I don’t know him that well.

If they could find some way to include Tropic Thunder in the mix, it should be. Nowadays such a movie would never get made. People are way too sensitive about stuff like that now. But as other people have said, you’re missing the point if you just look it as “he got away with playing a character doing blackface”. The joke is that he played an actor that was so caught up in their own ego, ala “I’m the only one who could’ve played this role” and he went out of his way to give himself the look to pull it off. Having Brandon T Jackson as that voice of reason to say what everyone in the audience is thinking is exactly why it works.

A Realm of Possibilities
aka- the daydreaming section


Who would play the lead role? Chances are they haven’t been born yet. Such a biopic might not be made while he’s still alive- and here’s hoping he gets to be at a ripe old age after everything.
His kids are a good possibility, though. Indio did play a younger version of him in one movie.
Then there’s the question of how many actors would play him through his life. 3 at minimum, probably. A younger version for working on his dad’s movies and early childhood moments. One for his 20s and the rehab/jail time arc. Then where he is now- 2003 onward.
Also- I don’t care how good their American accent is- they need to cast New York actors to play him. That’s my personal caveat. I hate when British actors play American.

The basics of what story arcs should be included:

  • growing up with the counter culture movement in his family and his dads filmmaking
  • Going to Santa Monica high with a lot of the big brat pack names, culminating in the John Hughes experience
  • Less than zero
  • Burying his clothes from Less than Zero and doing research for Chaplin
  • Rehab, Jodie Foster, and “two girls and a guy”
  • Court tv and jail time
  • Ally McBeal, ending with him being fired and Calista flockhart fainting after hearing the news (this reportedly happened)
  • His first jobs out of rehab, Mel Gibson, and meeting Susan
  • Susan’s ultimatum and their wedding
  • A montage of roles leading up to the audition for iron man
  • Some witty banter between him and Jude law while working on the Sherlock Holmes set
  • He and mark ruffalo bond after avengers and he goes on his “carbon footprint” agenda he’d been on for the past few years
  • Oscar time!

I can’t help but want this to follow the “Chaplin” blueprint. Despite how heavily they focused on the controversies, they also did a lot of things right.

Maybe at a later date I’ll come back to this and come back with a solid outline of how I’d like this thing to go.
Although my approach might sound more like a documentary than a biopic.
In light of recent events, I’d really love an updated biography of him. All the ones I came across in 2011 focused heavily on the 90s and his recent successes were scarcely a footnote.

Ideally, it would be a two hour movie. Maybe 2 and a half. Rated R for drug use and language. There was one incident he was arrested for where he was reportedly driving naked throwing invisible rats out the window and there was a loaded gun (with dumdum bullets- his words) in the glove compartment. But if things need to be edited down for pacing, there should only be one bizarre incident included. I’d choose the one where he broke into his neighbor’s house and fell asleep in their laundry room.
For any normal movie (i.e. not X rated or pornographic), my opinion is nudity should be limited as long as it contributes to the plot. Full frontal male nudity especially. (Yeah, I’m a straight woman but I’m still very self conscious about that stuff in movies and tend to avoid it if I can)

And for those who are curious how I know these quotes as well as I do, I did binge a lot of interviews in 2011 and watched a few multiple times. I didn’t have a lot going on at the time and my life wasn’t going well so it was a good escape.
Charlie Rose isn’t held in high regard like he used to be but if you can find his interview with Robert from 2003, watch it. They go into a lot of deep stuff that makes you think. Also one of many interviews I saw early on that showed me how articulate and intelligent this actor is. As much as I’m attracted to him or find his life’s story so compelling, I admire how eloquent he is when he’s given free rein. As someone who has to rehearse a thought several times in my head before speaking it aloud, I wish I had that super power.

Monday, March 11, 2024

Robert Downey Jr. wins!!- and other 2024 Oscar highlights

(had to find a photo somewhere online just to remind myself this actually happened)


Victory Lap


RDJ first appeared on my radar in 2008 with Tropic Thunder and I’d been lobbying for him win an Oscar ever since. 16 years later (oddly enough, the same length of time between his first Oscars as a nominee and his 2nd nominated role), it finally happened.
From now on, when they show movie trailers of him, his name will be preceded by “academy award winner.”
I’m still in disbelief, honestly. As much as I wanted this, I didn’t want to give myself permission to get excited until his name was called. The fact Robert DeNiro was also nominated made me listen extra closely to make sure I heard correctly he actually won.
And his speech was pretty much everything I expected, but I’m sure all the victories preceding this one helped him prepare for it.

I’d go on some more but I have a more substantial post in mind. Something I didn’t want to post until I knew for sure he’d won. The last thing I wanted to do was jinx this.
I’ll just add a little retrospective on his history with this awards show.
He lost for “Chaplin” because Al Pacino had been passed over a few times before he finally won. Would winning an Oscar at the age of 26 have changed the way his life went during the 90s? There’s a good chance it wouldn’t have made a difference. If anything, him winning might have been the worst thing that happened to him. Showering praise on the young and inexperienced in show business tends to have some adverse effects.
Then his Tropic Thunder performance lost to Heath Ledger. Part of me will always believe the only reason he won or was even nominated was because he died in the middle of filmmaking. But considering the Tropic Thunder role and the controversy surrounding it, him getting passed over then also makes sense. Plus he was still winning back the masses after his personal life had gotten in the way of his professional life for so long.
Now, he’s finally the DiCaprio and Pacino nominee. He finally earned his due. And hearing how this year’s vote had a higher than normal turnout, part of me wonders if it’s because that many people wanted him to win as much as I did.

Also, Jimmy Kimmel said how 20 years ago, his most recent role was Tim Allen’s antagonist in the shaggy dog remake. I completely forgot about that movie, haha.
But he was also off by a couple years. In 2004, Robert’s movie that year was Gothika. The movie where he said his fondest memory (other than playing the doctor on the opposite side of the table) was “romancing the producer.” In his speech he said how he was the rescue pup she’d helped out of the gutter. It’s a bit more complicated but she deserves all the credit in the world for why he’s here. And on set, Team Downey is as good as a team as they are on the home front.

Yes, you read correctly. This is the short version of my victory lap over this news. More to come later this week.


Did the headlines hype the wrong rivalry?


Since last summer, many journalists were saying the same thing. Barbie and Oppenheimer were going to take all the awards. And when the nominations were announced, things seemed to be looking that way. But to echo what everyone else had said, there were two people conspicuously absent. Margot Robbie for best actress and Greta Gerwig for best director. Both of whom absolutely deserved to be there and I can’t imagine why, except to clear the way for the people they really wanted to win.

Of their 13 nominations, Oppenheimer took home half. I didn’t expect them to take all of them but I was admittedly concerned when we were an hour in and they hadn’t won anything. Then Robert won his and karma was coming back in their favor.

It seems like every Oscars, there’s one movie that has me caught between annoyance and concern because I hadn’t seen or heard of it and it wins a lot of awards. Last year it was the foreign film “on the western front”. This year it was “Poor Things.” Considering it was nominated for 12 awards, none of its wins were super surprising. But the fact it stole a bunch of the awards I’d picked Barbie to win, I was very much concerned.
So I have to say this- there was so much hype about the Barbieheimer rivalry. But really, Poor Things was the movie Barbie really should’ve been worried about.
Poor Things was also the only one of the nominated movies that was being regularly played in theaters nearby. The two aforementioned movies were already on dvd and/or HBO. But some of the others (The Holdovers I was very interested in seeing), only played locally 2-3 times and they were at inconvenient time slots. And I wasn’t going to subscribe to Peacock or buy a dvd we were most likely only going to watch once.

And yeah, I guess if Poor Things ever comes to TV, I’m gonna have to watch it now.
It looks like a bizarre cross between Tim Burton, Birdman and Wes Anderson (who won for a short film this year but wasn’t there to accept it in person). The kind of movie sure to stick with you- for better or worse and I hope it’s the former.

Barbie was a little bit of a letdown when I finally saw it but I’d be willing to give it another try. I didn’t like Ken’s story arc but Ryan Gosling’s performance was such a show stopper, it might be enough to bring me around. (It was so epic, I was like "dude, if this acting thing doesn't work out for you, this would be a good back up plan").
It was just sad after all that the movie only won one award. And in the Barbie vs Ken face off, Barbie prevailed. A well deserved second win for Billie Eilish.

The result of my Oscar ballot


I’ve only filled one of these out a couple of times but it might be a tradition I’ll continue going forward.
I got 13/23 wins correct, which is my average.

Barbie aside, it was kinda disappointing I didn’t get the lead acting categories correct. But I also couldn’t be too mad about either one. I honestly thought Lily Gladstone was nominated because she was going to win- Hollywood’s too-little-too-late way of making up for the 
Sacheen Littlefeather controversy. But I’d loved Emma stone since “Easy A” so any time she wins is a win for me.
After watching a Hollywood reporter round table on YouTube (featuring RDJ, Mark Ruffalo and three of the best actor contenders), I picked Jeffrey Wright to win for American Fiction. He received so much praise from the other actors and his role sounded interesting to me.  It’s one of those roles and movies that people had been clamoring for that shines a spotlight on other backgrounds.(I'd have to see it for myself but it's about a black writer who earns accolades for writing a novel that- quoting Wikipedia here- "mock[s] the literary clichés expected from Black writers." He'd written it out of spite and it winds up becoming an overnight success).
That being said, I can’t be mad at Cillian Murphy winning for Oppenheimer. He did that role so well.

And of course I’m thrilled Oppenheimer won best picture because I can actually say I’d seen it and agree that it was worthy.
Although the way Al Pacino handled the presenting of the award, I was a bit concerned it was going to be the LaLa Land debacle all over again.
No disrespect but the academy needs to do better selecting people to present this award because it’s the most important one. Between Al Pacino and Warren Beatty, the ball has been dropped a bit too much in recent years.

The supporting actress winner, Da'Vine Joy Randolph, set the tone for the rest of the show. She thanked her publicist for being instrumental in her success. So a bunch of people rode those coat tails. (Robert thanked his stylist as well as his agent who’d helped him a lot over the years, not just limited to helping him get insured to do movies when he wasn’t at his most reliable).


Jimmy Kimmel


Again he was a good host. Although a couple of his jokes fell flat for me. Two of which were political jokes. :sigh: Dude just can’t help himself and I hate that.
And the whole John Cena streaker joke… I’d seen the dude have no issue with nude scenes in a couple movies but doing it live is a different animal. No wonder the poor dude was uncomfortable.
And predictably, he got one little job at Matt Damon in there at the end.


Best Oscars in years?


I may be a little biased in this regard but it was a great show even without all the Oppenheimer victories.

And I think the biggest reason was the lack of grandstanding and soap box speeches. People won their trophies and thanked all the people that helped them get there. It’s the way it should be and hadn’t been for a while.
The only point that shifted away from this was Ukraine winning their first Oscar (Best Documentary) and the recipient speaking in support of his country. And also the snippet from Alexei Navalny, the Russian activist who’d died in prison (none of us believe the whole “death by natural causes” cover story) right before the "In Memoriam" segment. There were some complaints (including at least one person in our house) that you couldn’t read the names all that well. I saw enough of them that they left the intended impact. They showed Matthew Perry and his loss hit me as hard as it did when I first heard. It still doesn’t feel real. Having Andrea Bocelli there in person singing "Time to Say Goodbye" with his son, in Italian and English, also super touching.

Another cool thing was having 5 previous acting winners giving speeches for the nominees. You could really feel the love and admiration in the room.
And of course I didn’t expect anything less when Sam Rockwell delivered a few lines about RDJ with playful prodding. The most well known being “he doesn’t drop character until the DVD commentary.” Speaking from the 2-3 of his commentaries I’d sat through, it was just the one time. But I’d recommend the commentary for Tropic Thunder just the same.

Another neat thing about the awards this year. In addition to some of the international winners, several were from the UK and ended their acceptance speeches with wishes of “happy Mother’s Day.”
We have a wall calendar from the British Isles this year. It’s a bit strange having the week start with Monday. But sure enough, on March 10th it says “mothering Sunday”

This year, the show started a little after 7pm my time and ended around 10:30... there were some complaints about this, but honestly, I'd be all for this time slot going forward. Speaking as someone who has to get up early to work the next day.

Sunday, March 10, 2024

"Call me Kat" and battered protagonist syndrome

If there’s another name for this, feel free to let me know. It’s just one way I can describe a recent trend in sitcoms that’s been getting under my skin as of late.


A couple years ago, Fox had two new shows- “Call me Kat” and “Welcome to Flatch”. Two off-the-walls comedies with a modest following I thought had been cancelled by last year’s writers strike.
I got curious the other day and did a little research.
I was wrong. They were actually cancelled around this time a year ago, back when it was still weather balloon and train derailment season. Strike season (impacting writers, actor and auto workers) was still a month or so off.


While “Flatch” was very strange yet lovable and oddball, following a similar formula as The Office, I really liked “Kat” and I’m sad it’s gone.
That being said, it’s not immune to criticism. Reading various reviews, even the people who liked it took issues for a bunch of things. Most of which I couldn’t help but agree with. The show was far from perfect but what show is?
There was only one criticism that was completely missing from the comments and it’s why I’m here.

Maybe this perspective makes me naive or old fashioned or whatever… but I always thought the protagonist was the star of the show and the other characters are always supposed to like them and support them.
But it seemed to me like Kat had a group of people around her that didn’t get her quirks or play them off for laughs.

The biggest offender is her mom, Sheila. All the online criticism was focused on how much plastic surgery the actress had. Nobody mentioned how horrible she is as a mom. In her mind, Kat should have kept her high paying job and started giving her grandchildren. Then when she and Max broke up, she criticized her for it and didn’t want to understand why she did it. I mean, it is a huge leap- quitting a good job to live your dream of running a cat cafe. But there isn’t one episode where she doesn’t write it off as a waste of time or a bad decision. Sooner or later, you have to get with the program and let your children live their lives.
There’d be the occasional story arc where they have a heart to heart and Sheila offers some sort of apology and is grateful she has Kat. Then she goes back to being demeaning and condescending an episode later like that understanding never happened.

I have my own opinions about female characters constantly being badgered about “when are you having kids?” so I’ll leave that alone for now. Married with no kids is my dream and I want to see more representation of that in the media.
Ok, rant over.

The quirky girl archetype is maybe a little more done by this point (Disney has really leaned into it lately between Frozen and Encanto) but I still like it. Just with Kat, it was frustrating she was the only quirky one and nobody else wanted to get on board with that. Even Max would go along with her on that for so far.
The way the other characters treated her quirks is the reason I reserve mine for my closest friends and family. I feel self conscious about showing that side of me unless I know for sure other people won’t laugh at me or treat me like I’m some sort of a weirdo. This is something I still struggle with and I’m in my late 30s.
On the other hand, New Girl had Jess as the quirky title character the other guys didn’t really get. But eventually they got her humor and they found fun quirky things to do together. Like that one game they always played and somehow knew the rules to and I still don’t know how it works. I'll have to look up the rules online at some point.

Just to give some other examples of this “battered protagonist” trend-

Abbott Elementary is a really big show that’s won a lot of awards. I couldn’t get through more than a couple episodes because of the lead character’s boss. I just remember her disagreeing with the principal and going to the superintendent for her to be reprimanded, only for that to backfire cuz the superintendent is in the principal's back pocket. I think her coworkers treated her better than Kat’s friends so this might not be a valid argument.
But that principal, ugh, can’t stand her. It’s so strange how Quinta wrote the show and cast herself as the punching bag, the idealist who wants to actually make a difference and nobody wants to assist with that.

Then “better off dead”- really enjoy that show. I didn’t see Gina Rodriguez in “Jane the Virgin” but I’ve really enjoyed her as the obituary writer who talks to the recently departed. But it’s an uncomfortable watch when her superior (Lauren Ash I knew well from Superstore, great show gone too soon) is dripping with demeaning sarcasm every other interaction. Her roommate Edward is no better but he has his occasional moments where he’s helpful and telling things like they are is actually helpful.

But does it always have to be like that? Treating someone poorly one minute but the next they’re helpful in a way you didn’t expect.
Big Bang Theory has some of this also but I like the characters enough that I can get past these issues. Even Sheldon grew on me over time even though he’s super frustrating, especially when he can talk his way out of any transgression.
Is it so hard to be nice without it coming from a back handed compliment?

“Glee” also came to mind while I was brainstorming for this. I realize it’s technically an ensemble show but I always thought Rachel was the main character and I think she gets too much hate. She’s not perfect and she’d done things I don’t agree with. (Giving up her Funny Girl lead to do a sitcom that got cancelled after one season was the absolute worst- I blame the writers... they didn't need to force a final season because it ended well with how the previous one ended)
But her whole dynamic with Santana- I’m Team Rachel all the way. No disrespect to Naya Rivera, who was gone too soon like two of other Glee cast members, I didn’t like Santana intruding on Rachel’s broadway dreams, squatting in her loft with Kurt and auditioning as her understudy. How would you like it if the person who bullied you in school came into your life and competed with you like that? She should’ve found her own dream and left Rachel alone. The only good thing she did was being the voice of reason that got her the courage to do her opening night of Funny Girl.

Anyway I digress.Back to “Kat” and its other issues.

My big draw to it was the cat cafe idea. It’s super cute setup. But I just about had a panic attack at the start of season two because it looked like they were doing away with it. The cats stayed but it became less about them as time went on.

I always liked Max and the dynamic with him and Kat. Naturally like a lot of sitcoms before it, them getting together nearly killed the show. Or at least their breakup did. It killed me when they stopped talking to each other. A similar thing happened during the last season of Psych. All of the fun got sucked out of the show and I just wanted the tension to go away.

One final comment on Max- he was fun and a great character and had great chemistry with Kat. But going forward, please stop casting gay men in straight roles. The reverse, also true. Although I really liked Darren Kriss on Glee. Blaine and Kurt were such a cute couple.

I had NO idea until Cheyenne Jackson appeared on The Masked Singer that he was gay. Adding insult to injury, he’s openly gay and I didn’t have a clue. Seriously, for every gay actor like Leslie Jordan and Chris Colfer where their sexuality is extremely obvious, there’s Zachary Quinto and Cheyenne Jackson where their sexuality isn’t as obvious. My perception, or what others would call "gay-dar," has been horrendous since high school and gays playing straight on screen isn't helping that get any better.
But I also don't want others' sexuality to be made glaringly obvious through obnoxious fashion choices. I'm all for representation and visibility, but there are better ways to do it that are a lot  easier on the eyes. 

The biggest issue people had and I can’t help but agree- the 4th wall breaks.
In an industry that’s become overrun with self-aware meta humor, this show was one of the biggest offenders.
The original British series Miranda apparently had this too but not to this extent.
It was funny the first few shows. Cutaways you can count on one hand and they didn’t last long. But they grew longer and became way too frequent. One commenter said it was like telling a joke and having to explain to the audience why it’s funny. And if you have to explain your jokes that much, you’re doing something wrong.
I did like the curtain calls at the end, especially when it thanked the crew for putting on the show even with all the restrictions in place with masking up and stuff. The one time it felt strange was after a big fallout between Kat and Max. And they smile and wave like nothing bad happened.

One thing about “call me Kat” that they did perfectly- how they addressed Leslie Jordan’s passing in the show.
He had his own over the top moments but he was still very likable. A bright light on that show and it wasn’t the same afterwards. Pretty much all of the comments agreed on that.
Typically when actors pass away, the shows will write them out, recast them or do a touching tribute show like Glee did for Cory Monteith (can’t believe it’s been 10 years…)
With Leslie, they did it right and more shows should do this. They gave him a happy ending off screen. Really couldn’t ask for better. Then it’s almost like the show struggled to find itself again and never recovered.

Sunday, December 31, 2023

My 2023 in Movies/In Memorium



In terms of movies, this year has been a mixed bag with a little bit of everything.

Just like New

We get into the habit of watching most of the same movies year after year, usually when they’re associated with a holiday or a season. But in addition to the new movies I saw this year, I revisited some I hadn’t seen in ages so they almost felt brand new. It’s a pretty cool experience, especially when you don’t remember exactly what happens next and when you’re caught off guard, it’s a thrill.

With the upcoming Indiana Jones movie (more on that later), we’d revisited nearly all of the previous installments. The only one I missed was temple of doom, which my mom watched on the tv upstairs.
But despite how much I’d seen raiders of the lost ark, I can’t in good conscience remember if I’d seen it in its entirety. Usually we bring it to the shorehouse and watch it there but the amount of alcohol we consume (no more than 3 drinks including wine with dinner), I sometimes fall asleep during our nightly movie. So I was finally awake to see the whole movie and it was awesome.
Another new-ish movie experience- Angels and Demons based on the Dan brown novel. Sure, I remember some people die and who the bad guy was but it was fun being along for the ride and trying to piece together the puzzles with Robert Langdon.

Theatrical adventures

It was another year we only went to theaters a few times. Neither of them were Barbie-Heimer, although I recently saw Barbie on Cinemax (more on that later)


Avatar 2
-It’s sad, I kinda forgot I saw this in January, lol
-I knew this was going to be a LONG movie but I wish I knew going in that they weren’t going to beat the bad guy and won’t beat him for another several sequels. It’s so frustrating!


Mario
-easily my favorite theater experience this year in term of actual movies. They did a really good job interpreting the source material, made a fun story and sprinkled in all kinds of references that even casual fans like my sister and I could pick out


Guardians 3
-another great addition to the franchise and good way to tie off all the loose ends. Although knowing Marvel they’ll find some excuse to make more and do something to screw it up.

Indiana Jones
-unlike all the critics that tore this movie apart, I enjoyed this one. And if my mom, the lifelong Indiana jones fan, enjoyed it, that’s all that matters in the end

Barbie-Heimer and more

As of writing this, I finally saw Oppenheimer. It was maybe a little too long but it held my attention the whole way through. It was really well done. In case you haven't heard this advice yet, I'd highly recommend subtitles. The music does get a little intense and loud where you can't hear dialogue. But you'll catch more information when it's out there in front of you to read. 

The Barbie movie, I admittedly have mixed feelings about. I’m not saying it was bad or that I didn’t like it. It’s just a strange experience where a movie has no clear villain, their motivations are justified, and things don’t completely go back to normal in the end. Or that it was one big cliffhanger.

I’ve loved Margot Robbie since seeing her as Harley Quinn, so I hate it when her characters get screwed up or get put through the wringer through no fault of their own. “Amsterdam”, another movie I wanted to see because of her, was really disappointing because of how her character was essentially gaslit most of the movie. And I don't wanna talk about what they did to Taylor Swift in that movie- that was so not cool.


Christmas movies

Of course in December we watched a bunch of Hallmark movies. I tried to stay away from the typical ones all the cliches and memes are written about. Scott Wolf brought me to one that took place in Ireland and it was about him and his sister learning they have “royal” roots. (I think their mom was in line to be a lord or something and she gave it up for a normal life).

There were a couple other Christmas movies that were hits and misses.

“Light it up 2”- some people get really serious about their Christmas displays. The new family that moves into the neighborhood already obsessed with decorating puts them all to shame. And play mind games until they take over everything so they can do it “their” way.

“Christmas with the Campbells”- the only person more obnoxious than that reality show family was Brittany snow’s boyfriend, who a) broke up with her cuz photography “isn’t a real career” and b) comes back and keeps coming onto her despite the fact he broke up with her. Justin Long couldn’t even save this movie for me- but his phony Midwest accent was also a huge turnoff.
This is also another reminder- people hanging around with their exes’ parents like their family does not work. It was already bizarre in “she’s out of my league”. Here, it’s like the actors knew it was weird but shoved it down our throats anyway cuz it’s part of the plot.

The only point of levity between these two movies that got me to laugh- like, really laugh.
A Nickelback reference that had nothing to do with hating on them for no reason. It was random but I appreciated it.

On the flip side, Justin Long was in another Christmas movie without a phony accent and it had much better writing. There’s still that stupid cliche where someone has a secret to tell and a fallout happens cuz they can’t bring themselves to do it. But maybe because it also took place in Ireland, that made it somewhat magical and more enjoyable.

More of the mixed bag

The year got off to a strange start with The Menu and Everything Everywhere All at Once.
It was cool getting to see an Oscar movie before it won a bunch of awards but it’s a little too out there for me to revisit.
The Menu, on the other hand, has a lot of rewatching value. Once you get the gist of what’s going on, it’s mind blowing. But maybe I’m a masochist for coming back for extra helpings (pun not intended).

The Banshees of Inisherin, which was up for a bunch of Oscars and probably won zero. That was kinda funny. Definitely needed the subtitles cuz of the thick accents. It was a bizarre setup where Brenden Gleeson didn't want to be friends with Colin Farrell anymore because he's boring. And if he didn't leave him alone and stop talking to him, he'd make him pay. The way he does this, though... you have to see the movie. It's so ridiculous and nonsensical, but it made me laugh.

The Fabelmans- I think it was based on Steven Speilberg growing up and falling in love with filmmaking. You can definitely tell it was a passion project and it was really enjoyable. 

The Whale- I didn't think I'd watch this because the idea of someone gorging themselves to death isn't my idea of a good time. But Brendan Fraser won me over quickly. It's about him trying to mend his relationship with his daughter. She's a bundle of fun (heavy sarcasm implied). But the fact she wrote an angsty 3 lines and her dad picked up on the fact it was a haiku- that blew my mind. But it was an odd ending... the same person who directed Black Swan did this as well so that kinda makes sense. 

The Doors movie with Val Kilmer- it was kinda cool for the first hour or so. I have their debut album because my late aunt was a huge Jim Morrison fan and I recognized a lot of the songs. However, Oliver Stone can be pretty intense as a director. The movie felt like one extended drug trip and I was ready to sober up sooner than the movie did. As good as Val Kilmer was in the lead role, it turned me off how intense he portrayed Jim Morrison. I know a lot of geniuses have mood swings, but finding out that some of the stuff he did in the movie was fabricated to make things shocking- did not appreciate that.
And don't get me even started on all the nudity. I know it was the 60's but did ALL of the concert scenes need to include girls with no clothes randomly coming on stage? Absolutely not.

Magic Mike's Last Dance- the scene with him and Salma Hayek dancing together... super steamy. I can see why she has so many men in love with her. But it was kinda interesting seeing her as this ex-wife who's very spontaneous when it comes to her hobbies.


More of the Classics

Then as usual, TCM was a great education on the classics and some of the greats.
I saw my first Bruce Lee movie- Fists of Fury. Not that this hasn’t been said thousands of times already, but Bruce Lee is a certified badass. It’s just insane how many people he can take down with him when he’s motivated to do so.

I’d wanted to see “Guess who’s coming to dinner” for a while and it finally happened. Sidney Poitier did not disappoint- wow!
Every time I see him at work, I’m just in awe and it was cool to see him do a less serious role for a change. Also knowing this was Spencer Tracy’s last movie and he gave the speech at the end while Katherine Hepburn was fully aware of how much time he had left- again, wow.
This movie stirred out a lot of conversations about interracial relationships and such. But one thing a lot of people may have forgotten- this young couple had only known each other for a few weeks and she already wanted to get married. I know it was a different time but I feel like that’s a bigger reason to be skeptical.

The lead-in to “It Happened one Night” talked about how Clark Gable turned heads when he took his shirt off and apparently undershirt sales went down because of this movie. The man did not disappoint, haha.
I’d seen him a couple of times, none that left a huge impression. This certainly did.
And also the hitchhiking scene where Claudette Colbert showed leg— I’d seen this done several times in parodies and other media so it was cool to see where it all came from.

"Wuthering Heights" with Lawrence Olivier... I didn't like the book at all. Had trouble getting through and keeping my interest. But this will be the version I'll compare all future ones to. I showed Heathcliff in a slightly more glamorous light where I can definitely seen Catherine falling in love with him. Heck, I did. The dude was treated so poorly by her brother when they were kids, Heathcliff deserved happiness and her brother deserved everything he wound up getting. 
There was a funny quote one of the TCM people mentioned at the end from producer Sam Goldwyn: "I made Wuthering Heights, William Wyler only directed it". He was integral to a lot of the creative decisions, including the scene at the end where the ghosts of the two characters walk into the void together. I personally liked that ending, even if it only served to reinforce the falsehood that Heathcliff is a romantic character.
It was Bella's favorite book in Twilight; this version definitely helped me see the appeal of it. And how Edward has a lot of similarities to Heathcliff- not the kind of guy you should fall for, but you can't help but do exactly that. 

"Doctor Strangelove"- I think I saw that and "War Games" at some point this year, so it was really interesting seeing how one informed the other. 
Doctor Strangelove was a really good movie. It held my attention the whole way through and had a lot of good lines. The ending was just a little bizarre but I suppose that's what they were going for. 

I think the only TCM movie I saw that I didn't like was "The Philadelphia Story"... I didn't remember even watching it until I went through my list of movies. I think it was a night co-hosted by Greta Gerwig and movies that helped inspire what she did with Barbie. I think I fell asleep during it because it was boring. Then we get to the end and the lead, who's trying to get divorced from her husband cuz he's a jerk... they get back together! I didn't like him at all and didn't think he redeemed himself enough to earn her back.

Disney

I didn't see Wish, but I finally saw a few movies that got a lot of hype when they first came out.

Cruella was an interesting retelling of the villain's origin story. They sort of did the Maleficent treatment with her where they made her a sympathetic anti-hero. How she grew up on the street with Horace and Jasper and they form a partnership together while she tries to become a famous designer. Although I saw it with commercials, which made it a little too long. And it felt like another needless "killing off the parent" start of the movie. They fully explain what happens later in the movie and it's later used to get back at the true villain, but when it first happens, I was so ready to write off the movie for having derivative and lazy writing.

Onward was very charming for a few reasons. It took place in a world of elves and D&D creatures and I'm a sucker for mythology. And it was a lot of fun. The ending was somewhat of a letdown but I understand what they were going for.

Enchanto- I'm so glad I finally got to see this one. I just knew that "we don't talk about Bruno" was its hit song, but I didn't know the context behind it. Supposedly he has the power of prophecy and he saw something that the rest of the family didn't like. He started to doubt himself and went into hiding and everyone just forgot about him. 
On YouTube, I get recommended videos for all kinds of things. I've seen Disney come up a few times, but its this channel where therapists analyze certain aspects of characters. I just watched one on the gaslighting in "Tangled," how Mother Goethel treats Rapunzel. Some, they might be reading into a little too much, but they did make some good points. The suggested video for Enchanto had "Toxic Perfectionism" written across the thumbnail. That, they absolutely had right. If I get a chance to see it again, I'd like to write about it.
My one little critique is that the songs are sung way too fast so it's hard to understand what they're saying. 


In Memorium

I don't remember all of them but these were the ones I wrote down in my journaling apps as they happened
  • Jeff Beck
  • Lisa Marie Presley
  • Burt Bacharach
  • Raquel Welch
  • Tom Sizemore
  • Len Goodman
  • Jerry Springer
  • Gordon Lightfoot
  • Tina Turner
  • Tony Bennett
  • Paul Reubens
  • Jimmy Buffet
  • Steve Harwell from Smash Mouth
  • Michael Gambon
  • Suzanne Somers
  • Matthew Perry
  • Henry Kissinger
  • Rosalyn Carter
  • Sandra Day O’Connor
  • Norman Lear
  • Andre Braugher

Lost a few legends this year, some I didn’t get to appreciate until much later in their lives. Norman Lear in particular. I didn’t grow up with his shows but after seeing them reenacted live on abc to show how relevant those stories still are… yeah he’ll most certainly be missed.
As a fan of dancing with the stars, Len Goodman had been on our tv pretty frequently. I had fallen out of love with the show in recent years, between Tyra Banks being a bad host and the lack of “stars”. But something about this season brought back that spark for me and I’m sure Len would’ve loved it.
If you haven’t seen the show’s tribute to him, I HIGHLY recommend it.
It truly embodied what classic ballroom dancing was all about.

Michael Gambon- we lost another Dumbledore. I'll always consider Richard Harris the true Dumbledore because he best fit how the books described him. But Gambon did great as well. After finding the news, I immediately wanted to watch Prisoner of Azkaban when he made his debut in the role.

Most shocking passing easily goes to Matthew Perry. I’m still getting my head around that one… it’s been a long time since I’ve had that sensation of “this just doesn’t feel real.” And it still doesn’t.

Paul Reubens- I really didn’t grow up with peewee’s playhouse although I saw plenty of it during its shortlived syndication on adult swim. But it still kinda felt like losing a tiny bit of my childhood. I got the chance to see big adventure the other day. Not all of his humor is my cup of tea but there was some great comedic moments in there.

Music had its fair share of losses. 

I know nothing about Jeff Beck, but one of the guys on my favorite Prince podcast held him in high regard as one of the greatest musical acts ever. Along with Prince and Frank Zappa (someone else I know nothing about except for his song "Valley Girl").

Burt Bararch- I remember seeing him in the Austin Powers movies and mentoring American Idol contestants. He was a great guy with a lot of good credits to his name.

The dude from Smash Mouth- that one came out of nowhere and it was sad. I'd been sick of the song "All Star" forever... but there's no denying the impact he and that song made.

Tina Turner... dang, she lived a long life and made the most of it. 

Same goes for Tony Bennett. I'd only seen him sing a couple of times, most memorably on a special with Lady Gaga. I'll never forget that moment where he called out to her and she bent over with elation. Apparently it was the first time in ages he remembered her name- his Alzheimer's diagnosis had been that hard on him. But as a huge fan of hers, I'm so grateful to him for the musical partnership the two of them had. She was going through a difficult time before they met, so bad she might not have continued her musical career. But she came out of that dark time with a lifelong friend and even greater success. Not to mention some of my favorite songs of hers.

Two names that were almost on this list were Jeremy Renner and Jamie Foxx. And I’m so glad they’re both still with us.
Jeremy Renner and Damar Hamlin of the Buffalo Bills started 2023 with a crazy one two punch. It was terrifying what both of them went through and it’s so good they’re both on the mend.

Non-Movie honorable mentions

These aren’t movies in the literal sense but I wanted to spotlight Taylor’s Eras Tour (which I saw in a movie theater) and the Michael Jackson Thriller 40 documentary (which was on showtime).
With the concert, I felt like I was in my glory. Not just because I knew almost every word to every song and seeing how they were being brought to life, but I got to share this with my mom and sister. I own all of her albums but since we don’t listen to current radio much anymore, they hadn’t experienced any new music from her since 1989 originally came out 10 years ago. Between that and the dancing with the stars night dedicated to her catalog, it’s been an amazing year to be a Swiftie.

The Michael Jackson documentary was really cool for a number of reasons. But what I got out of it the most was how dedicated he was to his vision. At most, I'd never been more than a casual fan who bought 2 of his best albums after his passing. But it was super cool hearing the demos for songs that would become the best pop songs ever put to tape. And also learning that the Thriller video was an idea he pushed for long after the album made its money. I thought of him as having this polite demeanor, but hearing him say how MTV videos early on were terrible and he wanted to do better... I couldn't help but agree but also, it blew my mind he'd have a bad word to say about anyone. And how spot-on he was with his vision for that video because it literally changed the music world.

Saturday, September 16, 2023

Things you learn from watching... Chopped

 Introduction

This is going to be a series of posts.
All revolving around shows that've played in our house for decades. We enjoy them but they come with their own pet peeves. Or simply lessons some people wind up having to learn the hard way. Sometimes, it's frustrating for the viewer but it can also be super entertaining to see unfold. 
Also, I am aware that this isn't a purely original idea. But I don't care. I want to make my own comments and hopefully get some great input from my friends and family afterwards.

The Premise

This series came out a short time after we discovered "Iron Chef America" so the concept was a familiar one.
But instead of creating 5 dishes from a secret ingredient, the contestants receive mystery boxes across three rounds. They MUST use all of the ingredients in their dish in some way. With few exceptions, there's always an appetizer, entree and dessert round. And the winner wins $10,000.

The show's been around so long that they've done several versions of it. They have episodes around different types of chocolate or they have to have a fried element in every round. There's been tournaments where there's 5 episodes and the best of the best wins $50,000.
Some of our favorites from the years revolve around holidays. Especially when it's Halloween and they have different candies and goodies. (But due to copyright laws, they can't say the exact brand name of the candies unless it's a direct sponser of the show).

On the other hand, they've had some tricky games. Like they'll have leftovers and the results are mixed at best. Or one time they had different types of offal (hearts, livers, sweet breads, etc.)
Then again, it's never truly Chopped unless there's one bizarre basket ingredient every round. This drives my mom nuts, but it's part of the game. You have to be prepared for anything and some people are better prepared than others. Even if it's impossible to prepare for everything the producers behind the basket throw at you.

A Few Words of Advice

Now for the meat of this post.
If you're gonna compete on Chopped, remember these things:

The Basics and Criteria (Taste, Plating, Originality)

  •  This bears repeating: DO NOT forget any of the basket ingredients. Not an immediate disqualification, but to say that it's generally frowned upon is an understatement.

    I remember one time a person advanced despite missing one ingredient... then got chopped in round 2 because they made that mistake twice

  • Make sure you transform the basket ingredients in some way. Don't just throw it on the plate at the last minute. That's generally frowned upon

  • Use the pantry to enhance your dish, but be sure that the basket ingredients are the star of the dish. 
  • Taste
    • For some reason the judges' table doesn't have a salt and pepper shaker... so be sure that your dish is properly seasoned. I can't count how many times (in every cooking show, come to think of it) I've heard the judges say there wasn't enough salt in a dish. 
    • Other key things they look for (on a lot of food shows) is that the dishes are perfectly balanced. Sometimes they'll say they wish there was more acid- particularly on dishes involving seafood

  • Plating
    • make sure you choose the proper plating for your dish. If a fork and knife is required, don't choose the tiniest plate imaginable. 
    • Also make sure the size of the dish matches the course and remember you are cooking for culinary experts, not yourself. 

      The only specific example I remember of this going wrong was when Johnny Weir competed on a celebrity edition. He made a tiny portion for his entree because that's what he typically eats.

    • Give yourself a good 2-3 for plating at the end of the round. Plating/presentation is one of the big three things the judges are looking for, in addition to taste and originality.

    • Fair warning: you prepare 4 dishes, three for the judges and one for all the camera shots. The best looking plate will be used for camera, meaning that if you're missing components (basket or otherwise), one of the judges will get your incomplete dish(s)
The Infamous Dessert Round
  • If you're going to make ice cream for dessert, get to the ice cream machine ASAP. If the other chef needs the machine, clean it out for them. (Just common courtesy). And be careful not to overchurn- a lot of chefs make this mistake and come back to find out they accidentally made butter instead of ice cream 

  • Think outside the bread pudding and pain perdu. SO many people in the earlier years made french toast for dessert and the judges are looking for greater creativity

  • This applies for all the other rounds but it's more frequent in desserts: if you're working with a crust, puff pastry or phyllo dough, don't serve the judges undercooked dough. That usually ends up in you getting chopped and/or tripping over the finish line
Other cooking tips
  • If you cut yourself, make sure you follow the proper sanitary practices. If there's blood on your cutting board or in your food, the judges won't touch it and you WILL be chopped

  • Give yourself proper time to cook your proteins. If you get something that normally takes hours to cook (cornish hens, spare ribs, etc.) and you only have 20-30 minutes, break it down before cooking it

  •  Don't make two separate preparations in the same dish (i.e. salmon 2 ways). This leads the judges to compare the two and the lesser of the two could be the reason you're sent home
  • Not as common anymore, but in the earlier seasons, chefs would set up their grill pans really late into a round and it'd be too late to get a proper cook

  • Keep an eye on your equipment. Sometimes stoves and ovens will "randomly" turn off and you lose valuable cooking time.

  • Don't repeatedly open up your oven to see if your food is cooking. (Seriously, someone did this with their cornish hen, it wound up being raw and they got chopped)

  • if your main component is fried or crispy, don't let that part of it be in direct contact with your sauce or it'll undo the crispiness you worked to achieve

  • Remove all the pin bones from your fish. When you cook shrimp, remove the vein. Having shell fragments in your dish is also not good

  • an early series taboo- for the love of God, DO NOT use truffle oil to finish your dish. Nowadays, it can apply to a number of other spices and oils. If you're using something that packs a punch (sriracha or ghost peppers) or tends to overpower a dish (i.e. fish sauce), use it sparingly or not at all. 

  • Sometimes there will be basket ingredients that have parts that are poisonous. Example: a fruit called cherimoya. The seeds are poisonous. DO NOT put the seeds in your dish- the poison will not go away when you cook it

Dealing with the Judges
  • If Scott Contant is among the judges that day, do not include raw onions in your dish. He hates them. He'll also judge you harshly if you use pasta and don't do it justice

  • I don't remember every judge's preferences but Alex loves bacon and Amanda likes chocolate. (No joke, some contestants have taken advantage of this. Flattery doesn't always pay off but it doesn't hurt to try if done well)

  • This applies more to the earlier seasons of the series, but it's something that stuck with me. Do not sass the judges when they critique you, especially if it's Geoffrey Zakarian. I've seen him put several chefs with big egos in their place because they were being disrespectful. After all, you can't improve in any discipline if you don't know how to listen and take criticism 

  • If you're going to call your dish (or one of its components) by a specific name, make sure it fits the description. The jduges won't hesitate to call you out on it if it doesn't

  • Don't give the judges a dissertation about what you "planned" to do or what components didn't make it to the plate. It not only gets you off on th wrong foot but they'll just say there's no point mentioning elements they can't taste. The one exception is basket ingredients. If you don't bring up the fact it didn't make it to the plate, they'll do that for you. 
Other Observations
  • Typically, each show has 3 male contestants and one female. For whatever reason, it always seemed like the girl got sent home first. Especially in the early years of the show. If it was 50/50, the odds improve but chances are the women got sent home first
  • If you watch enough cooking shows (like I do with my family), you tend to see a lot of familiar faces between the different series. I've seen at least three Hell's Kitchen contestants on Chopped. Only Roshni was able to win the whole thing. Sakari and Dana (both made it to black jackets but didn't win) got chopped in the dessert round, barely missing the tile of Chopped Champion

Wednesday, July 12, 2023

Theatrical Review: Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny

Date: Saturday July 1 2023
Time: 11:40am (movie started at 12:05)
Party: 2 (my mom and I)

Review:

Introduction 

I might one day go back and write about the other films in this series but for now, I’ll do my best to discuss this one without giving too much away.

In a world of franchises and remakes, there are two kinds of people. Those who hold a torch for the earlier/original films so any attempt at a modern interpretation will be met with low expectations and/or won’t be good enough. And those who enjoyed the older movies and enjoy the new ones anyway.
This has happened so far with the latest Star Wars trilogy and the Jurassic World trilogy. They have their naysayers and detractors but they still have fans.

Speaking from personal experience, our attitude about these movies has been the same. They might not live up to the hype or compare to the original films— but we’re just as happy to return to these fictional worlds anyway.

In the early years of my parents’ relationship, my dad took my mom to see the original Star Wars and Indiana Jones movies. She’s has a fondness for them (and Harrison Ford) ever since while my dad jokes about regretting doing so. He makes playful jabs at us about our various fandoms but it’s all in good fun.

Obviously once this film was announced, it was a given that we’d go to a theater to see it. What we didn’t expect was finding the time to do it on opening weekend and the theater had plenty of openings.

In the Context of the Franchise 

Was it as good as Raiders of the Lost Ark or Last Crusade? Probably not.
Was it better than the panned “installment hardcore fans considered so embarrassing they pretend it never happened” Kingdom of the Crystal Skull? Probably…
I know most Indiana Jones fans hated the Crystal Skull for various reasons but we still enjoyed it.
It’s one of maybe two films in the series my sister will watch with us. For one of the reasons a lot of people wrote it off for.

For better or worse, this film did a couple of things as their not-so-subtle way of sweeping the Crystal Skull under the rug.
They not only wrote Shia LaBeouf out of the story but the fate of his character became the reason Marion wound up filing for a separation. Which is where we find Indy at the start of the film (after a lengthy flashback to the mid 40's).

What the heck did happen to Shia LaBeouf anyway? I never really got a straight answer... other than him being another Disney Channel alum that lost it and faded away into obscurity. Or at least became a walking punchline...

Movie Discussion 

In terms of writing, the movie was good. Maybe a little overblown and unbelievable at some points but what Indiana Jones movie isn’t?
If you spend enough time with these movies, you recognize a pattern and the cliches that are bound to follow. It might take a little away from the suspense but ultimately it’s best to buckle up and enjoy the ride.

The titular object is an invention of Greek mathematician Archimedes.

For those unaware, that’s the same man who coined the term “eureka,” leapt out of his bathtub and ran to the king’s palace naked to divulge his latest discovery. The principle involved how objects of different masses displaced different amounts of water— not sure how true the rest of the story is but I always found it hilarious.

Anyway, the clock is essentially a Time Machine and the nazis (yeah, there’s always nazis in these movies…) led by Mads Mikkelsen want to find it to rewrite history.
This entourage has the typical cast of characters. The leader/mastermind. The trigger-happy sharpshooter. The strong man of few words (don’t think he had a single line in the whole movie).
The scene stealer was Mason (played Shaunette Renée Wilson). Her character deserved more screen time than she got- simply on the grounds that she was the moral compass of the group. Or at least the antithesis of Mr. “Shoot first ask questions later”.
Reminded me of Lally Hicks (Jessica Williams) from the latest Fantastic Beasts movie. There’s been a lot of demand for strong well-written black female characters and both are prime examples of that being done right.

One interesting thing that sets this movie apart from the others.
Typically Indiana Jones is a man of two worlds. He teaches archeology in college and he pursues archeological relics in his spare time. (Or is it the other way around?)
In this movie, the line separating the two realities blurs and vanishes. He’s actually confronted by the Nazis when he’s still in a civilian environment. Considering he doesn’t have his trusty fedora and whip on hand (plus he’s not as young as he used to be), he handles himself pretty well.
It was sort of like when a superhero is caught off guard by a villain when they’re not currently in their suit. Like Iron Man 3 or halfway through the original Tobey Maguire Spider-Man movie.

The triggering incident is when his goddaughter, Helena Shaw (Phoebe Waller-Bridge) shows up out of the blue and demands to know what he knows about the dial.
Apparently it was an object her father (Toby Jones) was so obsessed with that it drove him to madness and her ultimate goal is to make a load of money off it.
It just so happens he has half of it in his possession. Which is why the Nazis come after him— although they’re really after her because they know she’s been pursuing it. She’s gotten a big reputation for selling a lot of antiquities on the black market. Meaning she’s gained a lot of enemies.

This results in a multitude of wide goose chases spanning the globe. You never really know what side she’s on. Her only ally is Teddy (Ethann Isidore), a teenage pickpocket she picked up off the streets of Morocco. He fulfills a similar role to Short Round in "Temple of Doom" but today's P.C. culture ensures he's not just another stereotype.

If there’s one big negative about this movie, it’s one too many chase scenes. It opens up with one that goes back to 1944 and it feels like 15-20 minutes before you’re allowed to take a breath. The visual effects that made Harrison Ford look the way he did in the Last Crusade (the events of which take place 5-6 years before this one) are really well done and we get a good introduction to the main bad guy and Toby Jones. But it was maybe a little too long.
And there were way too many Nazis on that train ride…
The older Indiana Jones movies probably had the same amount of chase scenes but they didn’t last nearly as long. At least I don’t think they did… might be worth looking into.

Part of the journey is tracking down the second half of the dial. This leads us to an underwater expedition led by Antonio Banderas. There’s no snakes but there are eels. It’s a funny moment where someone comments that eels are like snakes and Indy is like “no they’re not” in this whiny tone so unlike him.

What the Nazis plan to do with the device and whether they succeed… that’s part of the fun. Although I kept thinking about how much time is left and how far things would go before reaching that terrifying point of no return.
Let’s just say that they succeed… and then fail in a completely unexpected way.

Grade: A-


Trailers


1. Oppenheimer
- I've spoken on this plenty of times already... it'll probably do really well at the box office and come award season

2. a 4th Expendables movie
- I hadn't seen any in this franchise so I can't say too much. But based on the first few seconds, Jason Stratham and Megan Fox being married and fighting each other-- I thought this was going to be another Mr. and Mrs. Smith movie.

3. Mission Impossible: Dead Reckoning part 1
- as if it wasn't enough in a previous MI movie, Tom Cruise was hanging off the side of a plane taking off. Now he's on a bike and diving off a mountain... and that's probably just the tip of the iceberg

4. Gran Turismo
- same preview I saw during Mario. Don't need to add further comment

5. The Marvels
- might see this when it comes out... they're making it out to be very humorous and light-hearted

6. Next Goal Wins
- another "based on a true story" sports movie about a coach taking on an underdog team. This time, it involves soccer

7. Haunted Mansion
- I never saw the Eddie Murphy version but I also can't help but wonder why this was being made again... although the special effects look good and Owen Wilson is always entertaining to watch. At least for me