Hey Arnold: top Helga and Arnold moments

At last we’ve reached the finish line!

It’s been such a blast revisiting this series over the past few weeks. If I wasn’t already sure this was my favorite Nicktoons series before, I am now. (Although Danny Phantom and Rocko’s Modern Life are pretty close behind)

What’s Opera, Arnold?

Obviously a reference to the Bugs Bunny cartoon “What’s Opera, Doc?”

The class goes on a field trip to the local opera house to see Carmen. We also see a couple of posters for other operas, which become relevant later on.
During the show, both Arnold and Helga fall asleep and each of them has a different dream where they put themselves (and their classmates) into the show.

If you guessed I learned about certain operas from this episode, you’d be absolutely right.
I’d since experienced Carmen through Evgeni Plushenko’s long program at the 2002 Olympics (thank you, YouTube) and, more recently, Bad News Bears where some of the songs served as the film’s score.
But it all started here. I still remember some of their made-up lyrics. I won’t do them word for word, but I’ll allude to at least some of them.
I knew the song "Ride of the Valkyries" from the Bugs Bunny cartoon, but I also learned about Pagliacci the crying clown from this too. (In Arnold’s dream, Harold was dressed as him, sang “a sad ugly clown” to the melody and ran off crying for his mom)

Arnold imagines himself as Don José and Ruth as Carmen. 

(Interesting fact I just read: the first Arnold, Toran Caudell, did his singing voice in this because he's an actual singer, while the current voice actor, Phillip Van Dyke, wasn't as comfortable adding singing to his role).

But just as they’re about to get together, a spitball from Helga wakes him up.
“Hey, cut it out!”
“I had to shut you up somehow. You were snoring louder than the orchestra.”

Then when Helga falls asleep, she imagines herself in a role from "The Ring of the Nibelung" and takes out Ruth with her “golden magic slingshot.”
Then she takes her place as “Carmelga”. After saying how Ruth is overrated, has no brains and enormous feet, she introduces herself and things fall back into motion.

But then Don José’s romantic rival, a toreador, shows up. Curly plays him and actually steals the show. The writing for him was so good and he naturally hams it up when he’s slain at the end. (He was Tybalt in Romeo & Juliet and hammed up his death scene so much he fell off the stage).
Just as the two of them are about to kiss and have their happy ending, there’s rumbling and shaking and he walks away and slowly Helga wakes up in reality. The play had just ended and Phoebe asks how she liked it. She said she did but “it just ended too soon…”
***

For the sake of continuity, I’ll do the Valentines episode next.
It was the final part of season one, the point when Arnold fell out of love with Ruth and he and Helga had their first date…. Sorta.

And yeah I couldn’t wait until February to do this one. It’s just that good.

Ms. Slovak’s class has a pen pal program ongoing and we see them all getting letters from them. Some get elaborate gifts sent to them. Helga’s sent just a note saying “send money.”
Taking notice of Arnold’s exchanges with his pen pal, she amends his letter from Cecile to say she’s flying in to meet him for dinner. But plans to disguise herself as Cecile in an effort to make him fall in love with her.
Meanwhile, Arnold sends a valentine to Ruth, signing it Anonymous and asks her out. After reading the letter from “Cecile,” he panics and asks Gerald for advice. Just gotta say- Gerald’s the best wingman.
It just so happens that both girls are meeting him at French restaurants that happen to be across the street from each other. (Take a note of this- it’s important for later!) Gerald suggests he runs back and forth between restaurants and he’ll keep an eye on things in case he’s keeping his date waiting too long.

Helga gets herself done up real nice, although I think she accidentally goes to a dog grooming place instead of a hair salon so her hair looks like a blonde poodle. Arnold says she looks nothing like her picture but they get past this really fast. But she also has to fake her way through the conversation until she shifts the focus back on him. She asks if there’s a girl in his class he likes and she manages to see how he feels about her. He says Helga bugs him a lot. She suggests maybe deep down that isn’t true but he says “no, deep deep down, she really really bugs me “

Then at Chez Pierre with Ruth, she’s kinda stuck up in valley girl way but without the typical jargon. He kinda jokes “You're probably wondering about who Anonymous really is.” Her answer is the last thing he expects- she’s under the impression Anonymous is the name of a famous poet. Because he's so formally dressed, she thinks he's just a busyboy and says he’d better be ready to go when the Anonymous guy shows up.
Ok, there are several poems out there signed Anonymous… but they’re not all the same person. Clearly she can’t put two and two together and Arnold is so taken aback that he never corrects her and says it’s him. Then as he spends more time with her, he learns they have nothing in common and he might have been wasting his time.

At Chez Paris, Helga gets sick from the food; the menu is French so she has no idea what she's ordering. Her hair deflates as a result. After coming back, Arnold is a little dejected about Ruth and asks if “Cecile” had ever been in a situation where someone wasn’t everything you thought they’d be after getting to know them. To make him feel better, she suggests maybe this wasn’t the right girl and asks if he’s having a good time. He agrees he is and leaves, saying he had something to take care of, but the smile on his face speaks louder than words. Clearly her advice left a good impression.

He goes to break it off with Ruth, only to find she’s one step ahead. When Arnold left earlier, a waiter came over and the two of them got to talking. So he shows up and she’s the one breaking it off with him. She doesn’t even get his name right- she calls him Alfred.

Then Helga sees them together and immediately flips out on him. He tries to explain himself and she says how she can’t stand people who aren’t honest about who they are.
Ironically this is when the real Cecile shows up. The audience sees this in the cards earlier in the episode, but it’s a shock to Arnold and Helga. Luckily, Gerald is there to swoop in, remove Cecile from the situation and the two of them leave for their own date over hamburgers.
“Ah, le hamburger. The American steak tartare”
…ok, that’s not entirely accurate but whatever.

Left on their own, Arnold asks who she is really and she says she can’t tell him.
“Will I ever see you again?”
“Maybe.”
“Just wanted to say this has been the best Valentine’s Day I ever had.” And then says “we’ll always have Chez Paris,” kisses her hand and leaves.

Back in season one, this was such an important episode for this whole arc. It was kinda disappointing he didn’t learn the truth, but it gave us hope that this couple had a chance to become a real thing.

Dinner for Four

Helga wins a free dinner at a French restaurant for four. Using her cunning, she invites Phoebe, knowing she’ll invite Gerald and he’ll invite Arnold to go with him. Arnold’s skeptical that Helga could be sophisticated enough for the restaurant but agrees to go. She also does a little research and role play for what she’ll say to him once they’re there.

For a while, things are going really well and Arnold says he’s impressed with how Helga is acting. Then a snag arises…

Remember that there were TWO French restaurants across from each other? Helga realizes when she puts her voucher in the check booklet they’d gone to the wrong restaurant. She asks Phoebe to join her in the powder room to tell the truth. She suggests they say it was an honest mistake and accept what happens. Refusing to save face in front of Arnold, she decides for them to order more food to stall. She also calls Nadine (who’d been into classifying cockroaches as of late) to let one of them loose in the restaurant.

Their waiter Jacques suspects she’s stalling and when he challenges her, she makes a scene and says she’s the relative of someone important.
A few minutes later, that person calls the restaurant and says the person she's claiming to be is in Switzerland. When the authorities show up, so does Nadine and the cockroaches and that gets Helga and the others off the hook.

However, she’s found out all because Nadine came by to apologize. “Sorry I’m late, Helga. I didn’t know what classification of cockroach you wanted me to bring.”
Arnold figures out and is adamant they go back and tell the truth.
“There’s no way I’m going back in there, telling them the truth and wind up wasting dishes.”
… yeah you know the rest.

Arnold reassured her, “come on, don’t you feel better now that you’ve done the right thing?”
“I don't think so..”
“I think you do,” he teases
“No, I don't.”
“You know Helga, I think what you did was really sophisticated.” He then sprays her with the faucet hose and winks.
I think she says something like “just shut up and rinse.”

Not sure if I’m reading too much into this, but to me, there was definitely some chemistry there.

Monkey Business

Helga is accosted by an organ grinder monkey in the park. It’s in love with her and slobbers all over her arm. As the days pass by, the area on her arm gets red and puffy. Just before the incident, Mr. Simmons did a lesson on bizarre illnesses and one was Monkeynucelosis where “just one touch or scratch from an infected monkey could cause the patient to contract the disease.”

She checks out a book from the library to do research and goes through the symptoms. Itching and puffiness, forgetfulness, irritability, loss of appetite, and expiration. One by one, she checks them one by one based on a series of coincidences. She also has a nightmare where she turns into a monkey, she tells Arnold how she feels but he doesn’t believe her and she winds up becoming spellbound into assisting the organ grinder after he starts his music.

When loss of appetite happens, it’s at dinner. She checks the book, freaking out. Her dad says not to read at the table but takes a look. When she asks if he thinks it’s real, he balks “I don’t know. I’m a beeper salesman, not a scientist.” He then gets a call from a customer. “What do you mean the beepers don’t work?! Hey hey hey hey! You signed a non-refundable agreement…”

With Phoebe’s help, she arranges some sort of funeral procession where their classmates dress in black and she gives them her possessions.
Predictably she plans on leaving Arnold for last for her big confession.

Before this comes about, she gives Phoebe her books and asks her to return the library book for her. Finding this whole thing strange, she opens it up, finds her bookmark and starts reading…
Rhonda says Arnold is last after she returns. “And she gave me all of these ridiculous dresses. The whole thing’s crazy.”
Helga gets as far as saying “I really don’t hate you, Arnold. On the contrary, I actually…” when Phoebe busts in, saying she’s got it all wrong.
“Contact with a monkey really isn’t dangerous. The worst you can get is a mild skin irritation.”
Once she’s through celebrating she’s not going to expire, Arnold says he's glad everything worked out, but wonders what she wanted to tell him.

She dismisses it at first, saying she was delirious and insults him. 

Then as he's about to leave, she stops him.

"Hey Arnold, wait a sec..."

"Yeah? (annoyed, arms crossed)"

"I just wanted to say that... I think you're... ok. I mean, you're a real ok guy and I think you're  ok."

"(he smiles) Thanks, Helga (pats her on the hand) you're ok too." 

"He thinks I'm okay... and he touched me... and I'm not a monkey!"

...I vaguely remember when I first saw this episode, I was on the edge of my seat. Especially for that confession scene. It wasn't much, but it was a huge step in the right direction. 

Helga vs. Big Patty

Helga spends a day or two at school making jokes at Patty's expense, calling her names and saying how she's "big, dumb and ugly" and "she's 14 and she's still in the 6th grade?"

Well, Patty finds out and challenges her to a fight.

Helga asks her parents for advice. Her dad's too absorbed in a boxing match on TV for any real advice. He just reads out of a book "fighting is never the answer... and always be a good listener." (which he clearly isn't). Her mom is a little more helpful, saying how her friend can't run from her problems and needs to stand up for herself. It's an intimdiating proposition, but it's true that you shouldn't run from your problems.

Arnold has a chat with Helga, learns about the situation and says she should apologize and it'll all go away. She goes apologize, but Patty says the fight's still on because she has a reputation to protect. 

Arnold finds out about this and he immediately goes to Patty to reason with her.

This is where he says he doesn't think she meant to hurt her, she says mean things about him too, but doesn't think she's that bad deep down. She does it to cover up her own insecurities. It doesn't seem to penetrate her head, but he leaves saying he's sure she'll do the right thing. 

When the fight finally happens, it's the same thing that happened with Doug and Larry in "Doug's Lucky Punch." Patty throws Helga into a rec room with everyone waiting outside, only able to hear what's going on. In reality, she's punching mats and throwing garbage cans. Then she messes Helga up, but not actually hurting her.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm making it look good."

"Making it look good? What are you talking about? Aren't you gonna pound me?"

"I'm cutting you a break."

Helga thinks maybe her apology worked, but she says it was Arnold that changed her mind.

"He says you don't mean to be a pain in the butt. He says you do those things because of... unresolved conflicts or something..."

After a little more banter, Patty asks, "You and Arnold, you got some sort of thing for each other?" She denies it. "I was just asking. He's kinda cute."

"If you like football heads..." Then they look at each other and smile. So maybe Patty is onto something.

Helga comes out, groaning in agony. Stinky makes a funny comment like "Patty probably thought it was too dang violent for us kids to watch."

Patty and Arnold come face to face. He's worried, but after she winks at him, he relaxes. 

Because Arnold defended Helga and had that reasoning for her behavior, I feel like some continuity was maintained from the "Monkey Business" episode... and seeing this episode air in real time, it was a pretty cool moment in the grand scheme of things.

Summer Love

The Patakis, Arnold's family and some of the boarding house people go on summer vacation and happen to have beach houses next to each other.

There's all kinds of shenanigans with the other characters. Like Oskar using a metal detector to get rich, Grandpa thinking he's stranded on an island when the tide comes in, and Miriam and Suzie bonding over dancing lessons with a hot instructor. And Big Bob gets bad sunburn again. 

Then there's Helga and Arnold. She's mean to him and they mutually agree to stay away from each other for the whole vacation. But by the time she has a change of heart, he already has his eye on another girl. Her name happens to be Summer. She romances him, but Helga learns later on that she's using him to help her win a sandcastle contest... also, she has a boyfriend.

But after the way she treated him, Arnold has no interest in what Helga has to say. When she finally gets around to telling him the truth about Summer, he doesn't believe her. But very quickly, he overhears Summer talking with her boyfriend and joking about how gullible he was. 

To get even with them, they join forces and build the best sandcastle of everyone in the contest. 

Another part of the grand prize: a guest role on the show BabeWatch. (Yeah... that's not obvious at all)... Arnold's a drowning victim and Helga gets to be one of the lifeguards... you can guess where this is going.

She has another excuse to kiss him and the credits show up as the director is telling her they can cut now. 

This episode was from the later seasons where Spencer Klein did Arnold's voice and he had a lower tolerance for Helga's torments. But luckily, the story arcs reach a point where he's able to read between the lines or reaches a point where he can forgive her.

Beaned

Another later season episode... maybe not the best writing in the world, but the final scene makes it another nice moment in the Arnold/Helga canon.

Helga notices how Arnold helps out a lot of his classmates, but doesn't extend that some kindness to her. In fact, he doesn't notice she's even there... 

But then he accidentally hits her with a baseball and she develops a case of amnesia. Becaise he feels guilty, he takes her home, feeds her and tucks her in.

The next morning, she wakes up and has her memory completely back. Her mom tells her what happened yesterday, all the stuff Arnold did for her. Helga's so ecstatic about this, she decides to continue faking her amnesia as an excuse to spend time with him.

But she dumbs herself down so much that it's actually kinda hard to watch. She pretends she doesn't know how to do any mundane tasks, like how to hold a spoon, and she constantly calls him by the wrong name. 

...even for me, that's overselling it and I'm not a fan. 

By the end, she gets a guilty conscience, realizing he's only doing all this because he feels bad for the baseball, not because he enjoys it. 

So she pretends to slip near a water fountain and smacks her head on it... and now she's officially back to normal. 

He offers to walk her home. She brushes it off because she can take care of herself now. But then he says it's because he wants to... now that I can live with. 

Helga's Love Potion

...I couldn't not mention this episode...

It was one of a few where Nickelodeon featured special effects you can only see if you wear special glasses you purchase with certain products. And the scene where you wear them is when the love potion takes effect.

Helga decides she wants to do something about her love for Arnold because she's sick of playing tricks on him and wants to show him a nicer side. She asks Phoebe for advice on what to do and she says they'll call it "ice cream." And she suggets maybe to forget about "ice cream" because it's taken control of her. So she goes to a psychic Madame Blanche and she gives her a potion. 

After she drinks it, she wakes up not having that emotional connection to him anymore. But she seems to have no energy in her everyday life. Mr. Simmons, the only one privy to her poems, is taken aback when the one she reads in class is mundane and boring. Arnold even notices something's up when they bump into each other and she doesn't tell him off. I think he asks if she's ok because she hasn't been "torturing" him today. 

Another funny side effect- Brainy is breathing behind her, she says "oh, hi Brainy" and walks away. He has a mental breakdown and shakes until he punches himself in the face.

She and Phoebe talk and they realize she's empty because she doesn't have "ice cream." She begs Madame Blanche to remove the spell, but she says the potion was just grape juice, chamomile and a little ginseng. She demands her money back and storms out. 

She bumps into Arnold and everything is back to normal...

***

Eventually, the Jungle Movie came out a few years ago. Arnold finds out what happened to his parents. Apparently they couldn't come back because of a sleeping sickness and Helga finds a way to save them. 

He finds out that she helped him, discovers his own feelings and they kiss... there was a short clip of YouTube I was able to find, but hopefully one day I'll get to see the rest.

Yeah, I've got invested in a lot of love stories over the years, but this is the one that sticks with me the most. I never treated any of my crushes the way Helga treated Arnold, but I know all about pining for someone, the thought of them getting me through the school day and keeping those feelings secret because I'm afraid they won't return my feelings.

And so far, nobody I've told ever has.