Doug: Bluff Scouts and Sports

I’m not sure if this is still true, but when I was a kid in the 90's, scouts were a big deal. Although I’m pretty sure my mom enrolled me in brownies so I could make friends... that didn’t go according to plan and I was only in it for a couple years. Long enough to see Wanamaker’s Christmas display in Philly and learn how to make loom pot holders.But I have at least 2 cousins who made it to eagle and whatever the Girl Scout equivalent of that was.

Just about every episode of Doug involving the Bluff Scouts had one thing in common. Roger was a royal pain and karma always had a way of catching up to him. How he got to be senior Bluff Scout with that attitude will remain a mystery.

Doug Takes a Hike

When Doug first joins, Roger volunteers to take him under his wing. He then initiates various hazing rituals like using his underwear as a flag and making him put up the tent.
But when it comes time to bring back something from nature for a merit badge, Roger gets more than he bargained for when Doug and Porkchop befriend a snake. Mr. Scaly is probably the cutest and smartest green snake ever but Roger was deftly afraid of him. While it was tempting to out his phobia in front of the whole troop, Doug helps keep it a secret. In return, Roger spends the rest of his trip doing favors for him... until Mr. Scaly returns to the forest. Then everything's back to normal. But at least they both got a badge out of the experience.

Doug on the Trail

Doug accidentally breaks the navigational computer during a canoe trip. Scoutmaster Mr. Dink leaves to get the spare so Roger (because of his rank) is left in charge. He then takes advantage of his position and makes the other scouts his personal servants. After Mr. Dink is missing for hours, Doug and Skeeter decide to look for him. The fact Roger’s cronies help them leave the campsite against his wishes pretty tells you even they think he’s out of line.
Not only do the two of them find Mr. Dink and get a badge for doing so, but Roger is forced to serve everyone else pizza when Mr. Dink orders out.

Doug Door-to-Door
This is one episode a lot of people remember. The scouts have to sell chocolate to buy new canoes, but...say it with me...

“They taste like cement!”

So no one wants to buy them. Roger runs an impressive bait & switch scam and Doug finds out. Feeling pressured to sell his stock for the good of the troop, Doug runs through it with Mr. Swirly, but quickly gets a conscience and tells the truth. This winds up working in his favor because the booster bars happen to be Mr. Swirly chocolate and they rush to his factory to investigate.

We never did find out how that cement truck got in there or how this happened for at least a year before someone noticed... and for that matter, why are they running these scout troop meetings in the public library?

So the fundraiser becomes a rousing success and Roger is forced to apologize to everyone he scammed.

Then there’s the sports. A good variety of them.
Two involve America’s pastime.

Doug Out in Left Field
Coach Spitz is running tryouts and rejects pretty much all of Doug’s friends. Only one meets his standards... but after Patti takes all of her gear off and he finds out she’s a girl, she’s rejected too. To prove they’re just as good, she decides they should form their own team: Patti’s Pulverizers
Getting that ragtag team of misfits into shape is easier said than done, but thanks to her coaching and team “uniforms” (bumper stickers courtesy of Mr. Dink), they come very close to beating the other team.

This earns them respect from Coach Spitz. He tries (and fails) to recruit Patti and when Roger makes a smartass comment:
“Yeah. Not bad for a girl.”
“Not bad for anybody, son. Now drop and give me 20.”

In the process, Doug also becomes a more formidable player after Patti teaches him how to bat left-handed.
(One small continuity error though- when Doug accidentally break Mr. Dink’s grill in another episode, he’s able to hit the ball right handed)

In a subsequent episode, Doug on First, they win a game against another team but all of the parents are arguing about who should be pitcher. Because everyone wants their kid to pitch so they can be the star. These people probably don’t watch much baseball or they’d know there are plenty of stars that don’t pitch.
Patti’s pitching was the only thing winning them games so everyone’s in a panic. But when it’s Doug’s turn on the mound, he ends the charade by sticking to his guns. He gives Patti the ball and takes his desired position at first base.

A lot of the shows I watched as a kid had episodes about baseball and they were always well written and memorable. (Arthur and Hey Arnold! in particular)

Doug's Big Feat
Doug gets one lucky field goal kick in gym class and he’s suddenly the team’s new kicker. (Patti was apparently it before but had hurt her leg and can’t play the next game)
Their next big game is against Bloatsburg and their secret weapon happens to be Percy Femur, fresh out of reform school. Percy is so un-tackle-able, the coach gets desperate and puts Doug in to kick on first down. But when he makes his move, he fails spectacularly. The ball skids across the goal line and his shoe sails through the uprights.
Mr. Bone (the referee) blows the whistle: “No good! The shoe doesn’t count!”
(Haha I still say this whenever the occasion comes up)
But Doug is able to come back on the field when the team is about to forfeit; Percy took out a lot of their best players. He not only exploits Percy’s one weakness (“your shoe’s untied) but he’s able to get the ball to Chalky for a touchdown.
Technically, it was an illegal forward lateral pass and they still didn’t win, but it was still a good moment.

Doug's Cool Shoes
After failing miserably at a game against Roger, Doug gets it into his head that his shoes are the problem. Coincidentally, everyone happens to be talking about shoes. This also includes basketball star Sky Davis, who’s running TV ads for his own version of the Air Jordans.
So Doug tries on the last pair the mall has... except, according to the salesgirl he only had enough money for one shoe.

Um... I get they’re expensive but who does that?
“That’s the price per shoe. You do want both shoes, don’t you?”
Somehow, despite the fact he lives in a trailer park, Roger is able to buy them himself.

There is a cool scene at the mall though with Sky Davis. He’s there for an autograph signing and runs into Doug afterwards. He’s wearing normal sneakers so Doug asks him about why he’s not wearing the Air Jets. Apparently he’d had his current sneakers (“my off court buddies”) forever so this makes Doug feel a lot better about his regular shoes. He gets Sky to autograph them and Sky asks him to sign his too.
Sure, “after all we are sole brothers” is a goofy line but the sentiment of the scene is really nice.
Of course the cherry on top is Roger tripping and falling in his new shoes during the next game. They were size 24 triple-E. Yikes...

Doug Clobbers Patti

...this is still about sports and nothing violent other than the boxing fantasy in the beginning when he gets a lucky knockout punch.

This is about Doug beating Patti in bowling. He comes from behind to beat her by 2 points.
This results in a seemingly endless winning streak where Doug is beating Patti in everything and she’d lost all of her mojo. According to Chalky, in soccer practice, she couldn’t even kick the ball straight.

Doug isn’t going out of his way to rub it in or anything but Patti isn’t taking losing very well.
Fearing their friendship may be at stake, Doug and Skeeter work together to amass as much bad luck as possible so Patti can beat him again. Broken mirrors, ladders and some weird ritual courtesy of Skeeter’s grandma.
It’s a close game in bowling and Doug reassures Patti, win or lose, he still thinks the world of her. Then by complete luck, she ends the final frame with a game winning strike.